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A Mother's Reckoning: Living in the Aftermath of Tragedy, by Sue Klebold
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On April 20, 1999, Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold walked into Columbine High School in Littleton, Colorado. Over the course of minutes, they would kill twelve students and a teacher and wound twenty-four others before taking their own lives.
For the last sixteen years, Sue Klebold, Dylan’s mother, has lived with the indescribable grief and shame of that day. How could her child, the promising young man she had loved and raised, be responsible for such horror? And how, as his mother, had she not known something was wrong? Were there subtle signs she had missed? What, if anything, could she have done differently?
These are questions that Klebold has grappled with every day since the Columbine tragedy. In A Mother’s Reckoning, she chronicles with unflinching honesty her journey as a mother trying to come to terms with the incomprehensible. In the hope that the insights and understanding she has gained may help other families recognize when a child is in distress, she tells her story in full, drawing upon her personal journals, the videos and writings that Dylan left behind, and on countless interviews with mental health experts.
Filled with hard-won wisdom and compassion, A Mother’s Reckoning is a powerful and haunting book that sheds light on one of the most pressing issues of our time. And with fresh wounds from the recent Newtown and Charleston shootings, never has the need for understanding been more urgent.
All author profits from the book will be donated to research and to charitable organizations focusing on mental health issues.
- Sales Rank: #10803 in Books
- Published on: 2016-02-15
- Released on: 2016-02-15
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 9.60" h x .90" w x 6.50" l, 1.25 pounds
- Binding: Hardcover
- 336 pages
Review
“…[U]nimaginably detailed, raw, minute-by-minute, illuminating, and just plain gripping. It's also the most extraordinary testament--to honesty, love, pain, doubt, and resilience.… This book is nothing less than a public service. I beseech you to read it.”
– Bruce Feiller
“As people read Sue’s memoir, what they will find is that her book is honest, and her pain genuine. Her story may be uncomfortable to read, but it will raise awareness about brain health and the importance of early identification and intervention to maintain it. If people listen to her – to all that she has experienced, and to how this has changed her – they will be quicker to respond to depression in young people, to the suicidal thinking that can accompany it, and to the rage that can build almost unnoticed in young people when the people who truly and completely love and care for them are distracted by other challenges in life.”
—Paul Gionfriddo, President and CEO of Mental Health America
“Required reading for all parents of adolescents...soul-piercingly honest, written with bravery and intelligence... A book of nobility and importance.” –The Times
“Reading this book as a critic is hard; reading it as a parent is devastating….I imagine snippets of my own young children in Dylan Klebold, shades of my parenting in Sue and Tom. I suspect that many families will find their own parallels….This book’s insights are painful and necessary and its contradictions inevitable.”
—Carlos Lozada, The Washington Post
“[Sue Klebold’s book] reads as if she had written it under oath, while trying to answer, honestly and completely, an urgent question: What could a parent have done to prevent this tragedy?…
She earns our pity, our empathy and, often, our admiration; and yet the book’s ultimate purpose is to serve as a cautionary tale, not an exoneration.”
—The New York Times Book Review
“[T]he parenting book everyone should read.”
—Parents.com
“I believe Sue Klebold. So will you.”
—LA Times
“At times her story is so chilling you want to turn away, but Klebold’s compassion and honesty –and realization that parents and institutions must work to discover kids’ hidden suffering-will keep you riveted.”
—People.com
“This book which can be tough to read in places is an important one. It helps us arrive at a new understanding of how Columbine happened and, in the process, may help avert other tragedies.” Rated: A.
—Entertainment Weekly
About the Author
Sue Klebold is the mother of Dylan Klebold, one of the two shooters at Columbine High School in 1999 who killed 13 people before ending their own lives, a tragedy that saddened and galvanized the nation. She has spent the last 15 years excavating every detail of her family life, and trying to understand the crucial intersection between mental health problems and violence. Instead of becoming paralyzed by her grief and remorse, she has become a passionate and effective agent working tirelessly to advance mental health awareness and intervention.
Most helpful customer reviews
244 of 261 people found the following review helpful.
THOROUGHLY CANDID & REVEALING
By Robert Steven Thomas
How does one begin to "rate" a review for a book based on this subject of gut-wrenching recent history? I put up Five Stars because of the candor, humility and deep-sorrow that is clearly evident and expressed in this harrowing account by the mother of one of the shooters; in a rampage that will be remembered as "Columbine" for many generations, as one of America's most tragic mass-shootings. This book is raw and emotional ... but tells the story from a perspective that few others, aside from a mother, could ever present. It held my attention from the first to last paragraph.
233 of 252 people found the following review helpful.
Raw, Enlightening, Educational.
By Sheri Lyn Schwar, author of Vasculitis: Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired
My mom used to get upset with me because I disregarded what was going on in the world, as far as news goes. Columbine was the first news story that gripped me to the point of obsession. I asked all the questions every other person was asking, and made assumptions I had no right to make.
That changed when I read Susan's essay, I Will Never Know Why. It, to me, is the single most important essay ever written, and it changed me. Never, since reading that essay, have I ever blamed parents for their child's behavior, especially kids in their teen years. I've seen my own child act out in ways that she certainly didn't learn from her father and I, and I felt deception like I never felt it before. And stupid. I felt stupid that a teen could pull the wool over my eyes. Thanks to Susan, I learned years ago that it is foolish to think I know my child.
I waited for this book to drop on my Kindle last night, and read it until I finished it. I did have to take breaks, because she is raw and honest, and as a mother, this is a welcomed relief, but also suffocating. I can only conclude that not only is this book a reflection of Susan's most personal thoughts, but a reflection of myself and all the mistakes I've made, and the signs I've overlooked as a parent. It's suffocating to realize my own failures, simply put.
Every year, right after New Year's, I share Susan's essay on my FB page in hopes of enlightening others. Susan, I continue to send you strength, courage and clarity. Thank you for being you. From one mother to another, I give you permission to mourn your son. You can simultaneously have grief for all the victims and your son, because the heart can hold multiple emotions at once. I wish you well.
135 of 147 people found the following review helpful.
You will never satisfy everyone looking to place blame for how this all ...
By MJP
Heartbreaking. The struggle you have endured Mrs. Klebold is felt in every word. Everyone has been looking for answers to this tragedy for years. You were harassed from the beginning for "answers" and were damned if you did and damned if you didn't speak out. You will never satisfy everyone looking to place blame for how this all happened but I feel your pain in trying to figure it out. I can tell you first hand that kids are very good at hiding what they don't want their parents to know, and anyone who tells you differently is a fool. Where there is a will there is a way.
From what went on in Columbine and what I have seen in my own local schools I can honestly say I can't believe it doesn't happen more than it does. What separates those who can weather that storm, and it is a storm, and not act on those thoughts of getting even and those who can't is the scary part, and I think not really predictable. You are a good parent, you certainly tried........and from the parents I've seen in my upper middle class world I dare say you tried more than most. Never be ashamed that you loved your son or continue to love him even after what he did. Unconditional love is just that, unconditional. It does not mean you don't hate what he did, it just means you love your son. There but for the grace of God. I wish you peace Mrs. Klebold
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